W.A.L.T: Write a narrative
Success Criteria
I know I will be successful when….
- The title is suitable for the text.
- The orientation tells who the story is about, and when and where the story happened.
- The complication describes a problem and explains what happened next.
- The resolution explains how the problem was solved.
- Seeks feedback and makes changes to texts to improve clarity and meaning.
In Ako Ngatahi we had to write a narrative about a video. It was about a boy opening a present that was a dog with three legs. Here is the video of the present. I hope you enjoy my story.
The Present
The present
One sunny day I was playing my favourite video game Minecraft. Mum walked in with a big box. Mum said “Look what I got. It is a present. A present? I opened the box. It is a golden puppy with a big black nose. I was really happy. “Ewww, it has three legs”. I threw it on the ground. It found a ball. The puppy went to get the ball. But it did not duck. He bumped his head on the shelf. The dog looks like it would be fun. I wonder if it will forgive me? I took the red ball. I went to play out with the dog. I am happy to have a friend with a missing leg as well.
David, you have used some great descriptive language to describe the puppy and also some good rhetorical questions. You could have given more examples of what the puppy did that made the boy like him more. I think that you are capable of writing more than this in the time that you had so hopefully I will see that next time. Keep trying hard with your writing.
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